The Black List:

By: Tate

Black listed items at my house : 

Syrups of any kind. 

Loose candy 

Gum 

Ketchup

Play dough

Silly putty. 

“Oh, how do you eat pancakes.”

You may exclaim.

How do we eat pancakes? 

Plain- just like your face . 

Sorry that was harsh but every time I have allowed syrup. My house becomes like a frat house- everything is sticky. 

I banned candy not because I’m a health freak but because I don’t like a whole lot a sugar in my kids who already like to get “turned up.” By the way I’m not sure what that phrase means. But we use it to communicate general wildness. 

When my oldest is turned up. I make him run laps to get all the evil out. 

Gum, play dough, silly putty, etc = it should be pretty obvious. I know there are so many tricks for cleanup- but who wants all of that in their life? 

But when I hear a kid smacking that gum, I want to take bath salts and eat someone’s face. 

Oh- I forgot why I don’t allow ketchup- I just don’t like it. So I blacklisted it. I’m the HBIC of this place, you know. 

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