The New V-Card

By Tate

I’m carrying my V card.

I told this to T-bone and he said “no you’re not.”

So this is how it starts:

Dan (formerly known in this blog as D) my oldest, looks at me after dinner and asked if that chicken (the one we just consumed) could be the last chicken I kill for dinner; that he would rather not see anymore life forms killed.

Ah! Swoon! Of course!

So I go to the store and buy all kinds of meatless items so we can all support Dan’s decision.
And I tell anyone that will listen what he said about not killing chickens and life forms.
And promptly spend $200 because I have decided we are all vegetarians.

I’m like that parent who’s kid threw a ball and now spends all the money on baseball equipment because they are sure their child will be a professional baseball player.

But I don’t like the word “vegetarian ” it sounds like a religion. So I like to say I’m carry my V-card. Because a card is something you can lay down in case you want to go eat some meat.

So I ask Dan what do you want for dinner. He says pepperoni pizza.

I said, “Ok- but know pepperoni means pig.”

He then said he will have cheese.

Wow! I’m so impressed.

Day 2 of being a V.

Dan comes home from school and is starving. Says he misses lunchables and his old life.

That is fine. But you better believe we are going eat all that meatless food I bought. So we will be carrying V- cards for the next couple of days because I’m not wasting those groceries.


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