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Call me Lady Glitter Sparkle

By: Tate

If you have seen the animated movie: Trolls.

Then you now know my body type:

troll

It’s called “Bergan”
And we hate bathing suit season.

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Cleaning is your job…

By: Tate

Meet CiCi.
Cici
She is known to make up song at random. Some have called her the “song bird of her generation”
Her latest hit was when she jumped on the couch and belted out this catching tune:

“Cleaning is your job
Cleaning is your job
You love your job
Just do your job”

I’m pretending this song was at random, but I happened to be cleaning her room at the time.
I mean I used to work for Congress. Now I’m in a 4 years old’s closet sorting skirts and socks.
Where did I go wrong?

 

 

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Spring Break

By: Tate

It’s Spring break.
Thankfully my in-laws are probably some of the greatest set of grandparents.
So my kids have that going for them.
Thank God.
They took Dan and are showing him a good time. Plus he needs to get away from the two babies.

Because here’s the thing about Spring Break…
Everyone.
Everyone is on Spring break.
“Oh let’s go to the Zoo”
Everyone and their mother is at the Zoo.
Crowds and a bunch of kids… just kill me now.
Plus, I start thinking that’s the perfect “hot bed” scenario for molesters and kidnappers to come out and mix and mingle with kids and crowds.

In children’s church, all the kids were telling me all their fascinating plans of Disney, Camping and the Great Wolf Lodge. I look over at Dan and semi-promise to get his Christmas present (trampoline) put up.  I felt all the peer pressure from his friends who have good parents or rich parents that plan fabulous vaca’s for their kids.
4 days into Spring break and that trampoline is still in the box 😞

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Spring Forward Needs to Go

By: Tate

Let me pose this question to any new parents reading this God forsaken blog:

How can you let this world throw “Spring Forward ” at you like that?

Don’t y’all want Spring Forward to suck it?

Y’all need to rise up . Spring Forward is a dirty hoe .
And we don’t have to take it.

Ben Franklin does not run this

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Team Melody

By: Tate

You know you have reached full-blown maturity when you watch or read  “Gone With the Wind” and realize what a brat Scarlet really is.

She used to be one of my favorite literary characters. Now, because I’m all mature, I can’t stand that hoe.

Now I am on “Team Melody.”
She is just so kind.

New shirt:
Team Melody:
Scarlet can go hungry for all I care.
#kindness